inspiration – Page 11 – Sidewalk Face

What Value Matters Most?

December 12, 2020March 15, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl3 Comments

Kindness.

Essay done.

Okay, that’s true for me personally, but I’m asking in regard to the creative process not human relationships. Here’s why.

Voyage LA magazine did a profile on me in 2018. A few weeks ago, they asked if I wanted to participate in their Shoutout Series by answering one of several questions. Well doesn’t that just sound super up my alley! I would love to, thanks! I select What value or principle matters most? Would you have rather heard the answer to: What’s the end goal? Where do you want to be professionally by the end of your career? The answer to that one is easy; I want to have made an absolute ton of art and I want to die suddenly while doing it. I don’t want to be anywhere professionally, hopefully I will die on my own free time. Not up to me though and I definitely don’t want advance knowledge. I do however, very much want to know the answer to the question I’ve chosen, but what is it?

I sit down to write it out and get this: Repetition. Repetition. Repetition. Cute start but then nothing else comes. I know repetition is important, but it doesn’t seem very inspiring. I move to intuition, much more mysterious. Maybe too mysterious? I need to write something that helps people foster that value and don’t know how one can become more intuitive. Could observation get the job done?

I throw all three out to my Instagram friends. What do they think? Should I write about Repetition, Intuition or Observation? A wealth of thoughtful reponses helped me see all three were related. If for some reason you are a curious weirdo (I know I am so it’s not a slur) you can read their insightful responses here: https://www.instagram.com/p/CIYVPgyHqmh/

The overwhelming consensus was observation. I was leaning that way anyhow so it’s a slam dunk. I am going to write that one. Because it’s for a general audience that doesn’t know about Sidewalk Face, my offering will probably be a bit light so I’ll also attempt a deeper dive here, for you guys, and really try and nail down once and for all how these three skills interact and contribute to the creative process.

Will post more when more has been accomplished!

Creative Process, Striving to Be Better

Tough Year Photo Album – Make the Obstacle the Solution

December 7, 2020December 7, 2020by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl2 Comments

We can’t see the grandmothers this year. You know why. You probably have a similar problem. I’ve been trying to figure out what I can do to make it one degree less sucky. I had an idea that we could make them a photo album. I used to do this every year and they loved it. It’s so easy when you have a toddler. Toddlers are adorable. It practically makes itself. We aren’t as cute as we used to be, but I bet the grandmothers won’t care.

I quickly gathered up the mish mash of 2020 and imported to Shutterfly. They do their best to “help” get your book going and immediately I had some spreads to look at. They put the absolute worst photo on the cover. It’s an iPhone selfie of us three all masked up. You can’t see any facial features except eyes and I’m thwarting that with dark sunglasses. Everyone looks awkward and unhappy. This was my Aha! moment. Lean into the awful! Make the obstacle the solution! This stupid photo album would showcase our stupid year. I’ll keep the masks on the cover!

Here’s some of the text that accompanied the spreads:

• 2020 was a tough year

• We had to learn to wear masks

• We were online a lot – so many pictures of us staring into screens. Normally super boring but now thematically on point!

• We also played games and did puzzles. We wish we could have done some of them with you. – Still wishing that.

• We made a lot of treats and watched the first woman become VP – We happened to have a photo of us watching the Biden/Harris acceptance speech with freshly baked cookies on the table. Otherwise those two categories would have stayed separate.

There was other text, but you get the idea. It was actually fun to play up the negative. Black humor is a weapon against bleakness. That’s what creativity is really good for, turning poop into fertilizer. It’s a transformative act that takes the worst and makes it the best. Every tv show and movie is built around conflict. Drama sucks but it’s interesting when filtered through story so take your drama and make it amuse you. I know our grandmas will like it. They are the ones who taught us to view the glass as half full.

Striving to Be Better

The Opposite of Ideal

November 29, 2020March 15, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl4 Comments

Embrace it.

I strive and strive for an ideal state of being. But what would I accept if it was all taken from me and I could only have a tiny fraction back for the briefest of moments? I imagine I would see everything that bothers me as the greatest of gifts. Can I learn to do that now, when it could be of use?

This is the imaginary scenario I set up for myself after a day of bitter complaining due to a total stress tsunami. Husband was served earful after earful of despair. Was he fortified by these revelations? Facial expressions indicate a firm no. He served a few back and I slid into panic. We can’t both tank.

What caused it? Just all of it, the overwhelming daily grind to the national nightmare to the international impenetrability to the galactic nonchalance. Something is going wrong in every arena. There is no respite. I cannot have what I want. I wake up with 48 hour’s worth of to do’s. No matter how efficient and productive I whip myself into being, it’s not enough. No matter how much I relax, it all comes back. I can’t find equilibrium. Give me a new goal, please!, I beg of myself while stirring the onions.

Myself looks at my son who is standing in the kitchen needing a role model, not a narcissist. He is asking me questions about something. I could go ballistic because his need is ONE MORE THING, or I could just be here now and do it different.

Okay myself says, here’s the new story: it’s never ever ever getting better so let go of that. But!….don’t freak out, to help you adjust to this new radically and permanently imperfect situation, humor us with quick mind game. We think it will change your perspective.

Imagine if in five minutes, all of it, every last problem, was gone. Gone because really gone. Dead, disappeared, dried up, abandoned, betrayed. All gone. You’d be on your knees begging for crumbs of return. Give me anything! Okay! Stop blubbering and you can have crumbs.

It’s all back! Sweet relief! But there are dirty dishes everywhere. You can make soup, but you’ll be making it next to last night’s crusted over skillet.

I am going to test drive this experiment. I see my favorite orange glazed Le Creuset cast iron skillet. It’s crusty with last night’s stir fry. I can barely see the orange under the decade’s layers of burnt on grime. Who cares, we are re-united! So much better to have you next to me dirty then cracked in two and thrown in the garbage. Lucky me! Instead of feeling cheated out of cooking space, I will focus on that nearness of your being. Having a dirty dish is better than having no dish. Okay, I can work with that. I’m feeling that. This game will get me through one more night.

I was nice and funny and kind and slow to anger. For one more night. Every day is a battle. Every trick in the book helps. I really am glad to be here. Thank you life. Thank you imagination. Gratitude bests grievance. Knockout punch.