Sidewalk Faces – Page 8

What’s Your Affinity? I Like Gray

February 9, 2021March 9, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl5 Comments

Remedios Vara is the kind of artist I would like to be. Transcendent subject matter, master level skill, unique and vast imagination, rendered in oil paint, preserved for centuries.

And this is my art. Simple subject, basic skill. I’ll leave the critique of my imagination up to you but it’s clearly not as vast. I make faces, not worlds. They are so impermanent that some blow away before I can even photograph them.

When I see art I admire, my chatty inner critique likes to start up a conversation by saying: you know you’re not a very good artist, right?

Maybe. Maybe not. It’s not being an artist that concerns me. I could try to make the kind of art I admire. I have tried. Nothing impressive has come of it. But making art is not about replicating or imitating what you are attracted to. The reason to make your own body of work is to discover what you have a natural affinity for. What do you do when there is no impetus at all except for your own? What do you make when you let yourself make? Art really isn’t even a useful word because it suggests things in galleries and museums, things already made and vetted. Art for me is a practice so it could be anything that one really pays attention to, refines and gives birth to. When we give ourselves permission to do this, we learn what we have an affinity for. I apparently have an affinity for gray.

Affinity and attraction are not the same. Just as I am attracted to Remedios Vara, I am also attracted to bold patterns and colors. When I see brightly patterned dresses for sale on Instagram, I immediately favorite it just in case I want to return and buy myself a little panache. But what am I wearing while I indulge in these wild imaginations? A gray t-shirt and old jeans. What’s my favorite item of clothing? A classic black motorcycle boot. What was my favorite thing before I stupidly lost it? A gray felt cap. Most of my clothes are gray, navy or black. I am comfortable in those colors. When I put on the type of thing I am attracted to, I feel like car alarm going off in the middle of the night. I don’t like it. I might even hate it.

So, the other day I noticed most of my sidewalk faces are gray. Obviously because pavement is gray. Is this coincidence or affinity? I am comfortable in this terrain, I notice the nuances of gray, of minimal, of repetition. I don’t get tired of it and that’s affinity. I can keep going year after year because of affinity. I don’t need to ask anyone else if it’s good because of affinity. Now husband might say different, I’m always requesting/demanding his curatorial eye. I really like to show him my little people. Mostly we agree but if we don’t, he is either confirming my own fear that one is a bit lackluster or sharpening my confidence through accepting disagreement without changing course. That’s affinity.

Moving away from imitation and into affinity is a move from scarcity to abundance. It’s the place where you can do a lifetime of work. It’s a place where you can meet yourself.

Art, Sidewalk Faces, Striving to Be Better

Doing It and Thinking About Doing It

February 1, 2021March 9, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl2 Comments

I am always thinking about doing art. For someone who thinks about it so much, I am agitated I don’t do it more. I suppose it’s because I want the conditions to be just right and I also want to do easier things like read. It’s so easy to read.

Saturday, I made so much art. I assembled and photographed a bunch of new Sidewalk Faces. Cute ones! I need some cute ones. Saturday night I did my abstract marker drawings. Heaven! I was in that lovely place: adventure, excitement, danger, knowledge.

So what happened Sunday? Good and bad. I took my camera to Runyon Canyon with the dogs and made several faces. Alright! When I came home, the afternoon was all clear for drawing. Instead, I ordered a takeout sandwich, scarfed it, lay down on my bed with a book, read 45 minutes while consciousness drained away and napped until almost evening. Husband woke me up with a question about dinner. It’s my turn. Agh! I started reading again to wake up, I hate napping! Then at 5:45 pm, a pretty late start, I get my ass into the kitchen and throw down a coconut curry.

A decent evening ensued but what happened to my plans? Why didn’t I do what I was telling myself I wanted to do the most?

P.S. This essay, like the 2nd half of yesterday, didn’t go at all according to plan. I thought I was going to write about how it feels to be doing art, not how it feels to not be doing it.

Maybe later. Always good to have a topic to explore later.

Art, Creative Process, Sidewalk Faces

Do It Now – Foil the Inner Critic

November 23, 2020by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl4 Comments

There’s been a lot of road work in the neighborhood; lots of large metal sheets covering the plumbing underneath. I pass by one with a turquoise paint splotch and the color catches my attention. I stop and stare. There’s already an obvious eye, that’s promising. It would need another one, something kind of big, the little seeds in my purse aren’t going to get the job done. I glance around but don’t see anything useful. I’m in a hurry to get to work. It doesn’t matter. I don’t need this face.

A few feet later I come across a chain and hook, probably used to lift and move those slabs. Not this again. I don’t have time to monkey around with a cumbersome object and I already learned my lesson about taking stuff like this home. I’m not assuming responsibility for the next two years. I walk on.

Wait! It hits me. The hook could be the eye and the chain could be the nose for that splotch. Okay. You win, imagination. I’m turning around and doing this.

The lesson from the two year bike chain saga (chronicled in the Bags of Crap Series which you can find on my home page) is that you need to act on opportunity right when it first walks through the door. What you do, gets done, what you don’t do fades like fog on a hot day or becomes a big headache. I’ve trained myself to get to it and get to it quickly. No over thinking, just get her done.

Besides the lack of nagging dissatisfaction that missed opportunity often creates, I usually get something really unexpected from acting quickly. I most certainly didn’t pre-visualize this anxious fellow. The hustle forces me to bench my inner critic. No time to consult him. He’s such a drag anyway. He only approves of things the world has already vetted, meaning, he only likes what other people like. Too much originality makes him nervous and then he starts chattering away in my ear, blowing my confidence. For example, he might say, that hook doesn’t look like an eye to me. What’s going on with the bottom of the nose, there’s no shape there. Too bad you don’t have any darker sticks. A shame you threw them all away when you were cleaning out your bags.

Stop! This is not helpful!

Is this a portrait of him? I think it is! He doesn’t seem to like it. Too bad. Go away if you don’t want your picture taken. No one invited you on this walk anyway.

That’s mean. I am sorry. Let’s be friends. Why don’t you enjoy the stroll and help me out when I get home and we’re trying to select the best picture to post. You’ll be good at that.

Why is that critical people are always the first ones to get there feelings hurt? I could ask myself if I really cared to hear the answer. Moving on! Gotta get to work.

I didn’t leave this face in place, not good for car tires. I put the chain on some road work related stuff so it could be retrieved. You’re welcome LADWP and thanks so much for keeping everything in good working order!