I was talking to my mom on the phone yesterday and broached the holidays. I haven’t wanted to face it. She’s been coming here every year for 18 years. Not being together is a big deal. I said, well, maybe that’s the very unexpected silver lining of this horrible election season, I’m so upset about that I can’t be upset about Christmas. She says, good job turning lemons into unsweetened lemonade.
At least there’s humor.
She got it from my grandmother, who was a formidable woman. Maybe scary. She was a scary woman. She didn’t laugh so much as cackle. My grandmother was a Texan, the type that lived without air conditioning, in Texas. She and my grandfather lived on a farm/ranch as far away as the moon. It took a long time to get there. If, say, you forgot to get bread at the grocery store, then your dinner wasn’t going to have bread. It was three weeks to the nearest anything. My grandmother served dinner late. She said people will eat anything if they’re hungry enough. You can work out in your own mind whether or not she was a good cook.
If anyone told my grandmother what she “had” to do. Her reply was: I don’t have to do anything but die.
Okay grandma. Noted!
Back to my mom, I found the big insect on the day of the dead skull in the picture above while talking to her on the phone. I mostly call her while I walk the dogs because I like to walk and talk. I was telling her I wanted to take it home but feared it would get crushed in my purse. If you’ve been reading this blog, specifically the last three posts, you know my purse is currently NOT overstuffed! It’s actually understuffed. There was nothing hard and protective I could put this fragile fellow in. She suggests I blow air into a doggy poop bag and let the air be the protective barrier. Genius! It worked like a charm. Who else can I turn to for this level of quality advice? No one! I love you mom.
Happy Día Day Los Muertos. I never want you to be gone but you can rest assured that when you are, I will remember you.
My mom sent me a video of herself with some crimping pliers crimping away at the discolored index finger of a leather glove. She’d cut herself while landscaping and bled so much inside the glove it stiffened up. She said she was crimping rather than chewing to return pliability to the leather. According to her, chewing leather is a known way to soften it up but she thought she’d give this a try first. She felt compelled to share this top tip with me in case my own leather work gloves become inoperable due to injury. Thanks Mom! No one looks out for me like you do!
I’m so proud of her. Still doing yard work in her 70’s, still creatively problem solving, still making me laugh. Love you Mom! You’re a role model. You’re my hero!
The son and husband got on a plane and left me alone in my own home for the first time in over a decade. I have been fantasizing about this scenerio during my motherhood years like other people fantasize about winning the lottery. Expectations ran high.
It will surprise no one that nothing hoped for has came to pass. The biggest culprit by far is a mojo eridicating cold that gets worse not better as the days wear on. It’s pretty hard to live the dream drowning in snot. I also have a significant amount of work. That’s why I am not traveling with the clan in the first place. Shouldn’t be a big deal. I like my work and it’s easier to work when alone. Let’s just say if all I wanted from this holiday was to work, I’d be yelling thank you Santa!
What were my hopes for this period? They are so ridiculously mundane how could their being dashed even register. I wanted to scrub and mop the kitchen floor. I wanted to get everything clean the way I do on the weekends and then enjoy it staying clean all week since nobody including me was going to use anything. If that went well, I thought I would neaten up a couple book shelves. Can you believe it? The fun I had planned! Last but not least, and way less modest, I was going to make some art. The kind you make when no one is bugging you and time is on your side. I don’t know what kind that is, I was curious to find out. I made some a long time ago and it was interesting.
What I have actually been doing is not cleaning anything, and I mean ANYTHING, including not washing out a frying pan soaking in water that had been used to sauté shrimp 5 days ago. The smell under that lid, I shudder. Poor Andy, do you think he will have to clean it when he gets back?
This is so not like me.
All of my meals have been either take out or almonds or coffee. I have watched quite a few episodes of Justified. I like Raylan. I like the way he smiles really friendly when he is mad. I want to try that.
Last night my throat hurt so I heated up some ginger tea, added the cayenne, honey and lemon like you do. You know what could take that drink to another level? Bourbon. It did. That’s my accomplishment, turing my home remedy into a cocktail. Cheers!
And you know what, that must have helped. I’m not about being bitter and boiling in disappointment so I have a new goal for this “break” and I am well on my way to achieving it. I am going to turn Decaf into MY dog. He’s our family dog and he loves me already but his heart belongs to Andy who has deserved this as he feeds him and does all the late night dogs walks as well as most of the other walks. But now I have the upper hand. I am giving him cheese and letting him eat all the gross meat bits he can find in the park. He is sitting on my lap right now. In life you have got to roll with the punches, even when you thought you were going to smell the roses.