Striving to Be Better – Page 11

Art, Sidewalk Faces, Striving to Be Better

Doing It and Thinking About Doing It

February 1, 2021March 9, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl2 Comments

I am always thinking about doing art. For someone who thinks about it so much, I am agitated I don’t do it more. I suppose it’s because I want the conditions to be just right and I also want to do easier things like read. It’s so easy to read.

Saturday, I made so much art. I assembled and photographed a bunch of new Sidewalk Faces. Cute ones! I need some cute ones. Saturday night I did my abstract marker drawings. Heaven! I was in that lovely place: adventure, excitement, danger, knowledge.

So what happened Sunday? Good and bad. I took my camera to Runyon Canyon with the dogs and made several faces. Alright! When I came home, the afternoon was all clear for drawing. Instead, I ordered a takeout sandwich, scarfed it, lay down on my bed with a book, read 45 minutes while consciousness drained away and napped until almost evening. Husband woke me up with a question about dinner. It’s my turn. Agh! I started reading again to wake up, I hate napping! Then at 5:45 pm, a pretty late start, I get my ass into the kitchen and throw down a coconut curry.

A decent evening ensued but what happened to my plans? Why didn’t I do what I was telling myself I wanted to do the most?

P.S. This essay, like the 2nd half of yesterday, didn’t go at all according to plan. I thought I was going to write about how it feels to be doing art, not how it feels to not be doing it.

Maybe later. Always good to have a topic to explore later.

Relationships, Striving to Be Better

Being Efficient isn’t a Great Epithet

January 14, 2021March 9, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl6 Comments

Here lies Caren McCaleb. She could put dishes away faster than you. Ponder that and go do something great with your life.

That’s what I am reflecting on after a little incident this morning with a bunch of stray plastic lids. I need to re-frame my habitual response.

I have a pet peeve that’s triggered almost daily. It’s about putting things away. I want every item to have a place in the home where it lives. I want them to be in that place, and only that place, when they are not in use. My husband does not seem to want this. He is okay with things being in all sorts of places. In my model, every object has an assigned parking lot that no one else can park in, in his, the parking lot is first come first serve and just because you got the prime spot yesterday doesn’t mean a plastic lid can’t claim it today.

The reason I prefer my model is that it is more efficient. When I am putting things away, especially the dishes, I can grab what I want to return and just place it where it goes. In his model, I grab what I want to put away, go to the place it lives, notice the space is now occupied by an interloper, set down the object I’m holding, resettle the interlopers, pick up the object again and finally place it. The peeve I feel, the irritation, is that extra few steps. I don’t want to move the stupid plastic lids before I can set down the bowl! I’ve got other important things to do like surf the web for bad news.

Imagine if every time you came back to your apartment, you have to double park your car, knock on the neighbor’s door, ask for his keys and move his car from your parking spot to his. Such a needless pain in the ass.

Or is it?

My husband consistently does a bunch of things I hate to do; bill paying, laundry, feeding the dogs, last dog walk of the night, veterinary interactions, communicating with our tax guy, installing everything that needs installing, car maintenance, Wi-Fi maintenance, staying calm. He also does a bunch of things so much better than me, like making chili and being a DJ. His chili is perfection and he is a genius music curator. Is there something on this list that I would trade for better tupperware management?

If we both did what I can do, how would this other stuff get done? If we both did what I can do, what would be the need for me? Rather than see this an act against my efficiency, I need to see it as an opportunity to be of use.

When I move the plastic lids to free up the space for a small ornamental bowl, I am contributing to this family. I am not being denied quality of life. I need to see my task as a gift of gratitude to those I love and not as stolen piece of mind. The piece of mind that will be lost is when I don’t have my wonderful husband and his wonder skills.

I don’t hold my husband close and tell him how lovely it is to be married to a very efficient man. Please let me give him a better reason to hold me close in return.

Food, Humor, Striving to Be Better

Sock Party

December 14, 2020March 15, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl4 Comments

I feel like I’ve developed a reputation around the house for being critical so I’m conscientiously trying to be more tolerate or at least keep my trap shut. Then I stumble across this tableau.

Does anyone have a suggestion for how to handle this uncritically? Is there a new standard I am unaware of where socks and dirty cake knives get to co-mingle in the kitchen and everyone’s cool with it? My husband’s defense was; those socks just came out of the dryer, meaning it’s okay because they didn’t just come off his feet. Good point. That is a plus.

I think what happened is, he was on his way to putting them on when suddenly seduced by cake availability. I guess I can’t fault him for that. The cake is really good.