self help – Sidewalk Face

Without Time, Nothing

May 25, 2023by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl5 Comments

The number one ingredient in any art cake is time. Time is the flour, indispensable. If you don’t have chocolate, no problem, make it vanilla. If you don’t have nuts, add raisins. No, don’t do that. That sounds awful. Maybe add rice krispies so it’s still crunchy? None of that matters. Art isn’t a cake so time isn’t flour but nevertheless without time, no art will get made.

I’ve always thought this but recently I’ve experienced it. So though, believing it to be true, I was perhaps taking it on faith. Now I know. For sure. 100 Percent. It’s true.

I DID NOT HAVE TIME, I DID NOT MAKE ART.

Let me back up and say, despite the all caps proclamation above I am not talking about Capital A art. I am talking about exercising the basic creativity to make life worth living. I mean I am sure Capital A art also needs time. Obviously any endeavor happens over time and therefore needs it.

Oh my goodness, is this blog post worth reading? Can I say something an idiot doesn’t already know?

I guess this is to say, more than ever before, I am grateful for and valuing the time I have to pursue creative activities. It’s been the central organizing factor of my life. It’s been my priority forever. I mean, I do take care of responsibilities first (got to pay the bills!) but if I have a little bundle of time, making stuff if what I enjoy.

So, it was tough when there was no time. And I suspect, I will experience that again. Frankly, it’s made me feel cagey and agitated. But’s it’s also made me want to make the most of now. I want to get back to it!

If you are curious and I am frustrating you with my lack of expository information, I had a ton of work in the last year. I also had a higher dose of anxiety than I am rated for, and I felt I was on the verge of short circuiting at every moment. I didn’t short circuit, I did all the work, and I even did one or two drawings and some sidewalk faces. My friends didn’t find me repulsive, in fact they really came through for me. So, I managed. But I was losing my essence, my joie de vivre, my sense of fun, the thing that makes me excited. Sometimes you can’t see something until it’s gone. I didn’t know this thing could go. I’ve felt it wax and wane, but never for this long. It’s been concerning.

I think the most important thing in the world is being in relationship. I have done my best to attend to the ones I have. And I am committed to continuing to attend to them. But one relationship that must be included in the list is the one we have with our selves. And the way I spend time with myself, is making art. The way I nurture that relationship, the way I grow that relationship, the way I understand myself is through this activity. Without it, I am actually not sure who I am.

I am so happy to have some time again.

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I wrote that in late January. I came back over here today to see what if any breadcrumbs I had left myself. How thoughtful of me to have written an entire blog post that is still relevant. I am over here on my WordPress desktop app tip toe-ing around, seeing if I can get back on this blog horse. Maybe I can entice him with some imaginary apple art cake. So grateful I have the time to try!

Art, Creative Process

Art and Time

April 20, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl4 Comments

Can you make anything without paying attention to what you are doing?

Can you pay attention if you’re in a rush?

Think of that time you didn’t bother to notice where you parked the car.

The most fundamental ingredient to creative action is time.

Make the time.

Striving to Be Better, wisdom

If Beggars Can’t Be Choosers…

April 9, 2021April 9, 2021by Sidewalk Face at Eagle-Crow-Owl4 Comments

Someone was offering me a gift. It wasn’t quite to my liking and the phrase beggars can’t be choosers popped in my head. In this case, the gift was substantial, something I wouldn’t do for myself and was fortunate to be the beneficiary of. I wanted to want what was on offer, not crave something unavailable. Quoting this phrase to myself was supposed to help achieve that. But no sooner had I said the phrase then I started to dissect it. If beggars can’t be choosers, then choosers must what? Pay a fee? Instead of thinking about gratitude, I started to think about this new phrase.

The phrase implies that getting what you want means you need to have money. The better choices are usually more expensive. I get that with hotels and restaurants and carpets and homes. If choice is the most important thing, then money is the most important thing. The more money, the more choice.

But what if having the ability to choose without restriction excludes you from a different worthwhile experience? Is choice always the best option? Is it ever preferable to be the beggar?

Not everything in life is for sale and not every outcome is predicated on choosing. More often than not, fate is the chooser and makes beggars of us all. You don’t choose who you’re going to randomly meet and fall in love with. You don’t choose your child. You don’t choose to have an accident. You don’t choose the Fiestaware that came with your spouse. You don’t choose the things you find yourself obsessed with like a love of crystals or plants or Fiestaware or art. Many things just happen and often those things affect your life far more than what you do choose. No one’s gravestones talk about their great choice in carpets. So why do we think choosing is the ultimate in self-expression?

Also, while it’s wonderful to have what we want, it’s only wonderful if we know what we want. Our desires are a moving and morphing target. Sometimes you buy something you think you want and find out you don’t. That sucks. How do you learn what you love? You try new things. How do you try new things? An opportunity comes your way. Until you try it, you may not want to. Until you love it, you may be put off by it. There is always an unknown period of just experiencing something and learning from direct contact. We don’t get that with choice. You don’t know what the vegan tacos taste like when you choose the pork.

It’s important to develop both skills, both mindsets. If you are going to pay, you might as well get something good if you can. And for sure, it’s good to use your resources to support your affinities and open yourself to opportunity. But if you are going to be the recipient, it’s best to have the ability appreciate what you have been given, to orient towards the positive rather than ruminate on the negative. To see that maybe you have been given something very valuable and rare. Something you would never have otherwise. Don’t reject something before you really know what it is.